Laura's Story

When I was 17 years old, I found out I was pregnant for the first time by my boyfriend of two years, when I told him he curtly told me to leave him alone.  Two months went by and I met James, we fell in love and he agreed to care for my child.  When my son was nine months old I discoved that i was pregnant again. 

I had become deeply depressed after the birth of my son and had been using cocaine to deal with the stress as well as to lose weight.  I knew that the drug could have caused serious damage to my unborn baby, so James and I called the nearest clinic for miles.  The lady on the phone was so kind as she described the different procedures and their costs, she also informed me that since I was making a saturday appointment, there would be protestors there. 

I was numb as he drove me to the clinic.  I was shocked as we pulled up to the building at all of the protestors standing in the rain, one supposed man of god even went as far as to shout "-be a f*cking man" to my boyfriend.  After that the greeters quickly rushed us through security and into a waiting room. 

The woman at the desk asked what kind of abortion i was getting and I said medical since the actual abortion would happen in the comfort of my own home.  When I went in for the sonogram I was relieved to see that the baby didn't even have a heart beat, I was only 3 or 4 weeks along. After that I went upstairs to pay and go through a mandatory counseling session.  I was amazed at how quickly the doctor administered my shot and how understanding everybody was, I didn't have to give them a reason for my being there, they just accepted it as my right and that was that. 

When we left it was amazing at how different the protestors were.  To them I was just another soul to be saved, so they were very friendly which annoyed me.  When I inserted the pills, i asked James do half, so I knew that this was his choice as well.  The Vicodin helped numb the physical pain as well as the emotional.  When I started to bleed, I just told myself that it was just like getting your period late. 

Over the following months I knew what I had to do, I got myself clean and when I was, I got pregnant again.  My daughter just turned one, and I would be lying if I said i never thought about that baby, but I find comfort in knowing that if I had had that child, my wonderful daughter wouldn't be here to smile at me every day.

August 2004

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