 |
Melanie's
Story
I am going through emotional hell
I
am 37 years old, single, the mother of two beautiful girls, ages 16
& 3 and 8 weeks pregnant with a child I really don't want.
The father
is a great guy and is willing to help me in any way, but I do not want to be tied
down to him forever and raise another baby by myself in a crowded apartment. He
and I have only known each other for 5 months and I don't love him. We had sex
while I was on my period and didn't use
protection. How stupid of me!! What the
hell was I thinking?
My family is appalled that I do not want to keep
this baby and I feel isolated. They love me, but I know they are disappointed.
I told my boyfriend that I might keep the baby, but now I have decided that I
don't want to. I really don't. I just want to get my life back and stop crying
all the time. I'm depressed, can't eat, can't sleep and I'm a wreck.
I've made appointments with my therapist and doctor to discuss this. I have also
talked to several women who have had it done and only one regrets it.
I know I want to do this, but my concern is how am I really going to feel afterwards?
What if I go into this major depression that I can't get out of? Or am I underestimating
my strength and overreacting?
Geez!! I feel like I over analyze things
to the point that I can't think straight. I have to tell you, I NEVER thought
I would ever be in this situation. Until now, I told women that abortion was wrong
and how could they do that. Now, I know exactly how they could do it and why.
It's the most gut-wrenching experience of my life. I want to get through this
and feel happy again.Melanie
December 1999
more stories -- share your story
|
