Melanie's Story
I am going through emotional hell

I am 37 years old, single, the mother of two beautiful girls, ages 16 & 3 and 8 weeks pregnant with a child I really don't want.

The father is a great guy and is willing to help me in any way, but I do not want to be tied down to him forever and raise another baby by myself in a crowded apartment. He and I have only known each other for 5 months and I don't love him. We had sex while I was on my period and didn't use protection. How stupid of me!! What the hell was I thinking?

My family is appalled that I do not want to keep this baby and I feel isolated. They love me, but I know they are disappointed. I told my boyfriend that I might keep the baby, but now I have decided that I don't want to. I really don't. I just want to get my life back and stop crying all the time. I'm depressed, can't eat, can't sleep and I'm a wreck.

I've made appointments with my therapist and doctor to discuss this. I have also talked to several women who have had it done and only one regrets it.

I know I want to do this, but my concern is how am I really going to feel afterwards? What if I go into this major depression that I can't get out of? Or am I underestimating my strength and overreacting?

Geez!! I feel like I over analyze things to the point that I can't think straight. I have to tell you, I NEVER thought I would ever be in this situation. Until now, I told women that abortion was wrong and how could they do that. Now, I know exactly how they could do it and why. It's the most gut-wrenching experience of my life. I want to get through this and feel happy again.Melanie
December 1999

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Tools for evaluation of emotions and feelings
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Healing Choice
After your abortion from Hope Medical