I had an abortion at the age of 27. I was in a failing relationship with an emotionally immature and unloving man. I wanted to continue the pregnancy, but I soon realized that I would be on my own, completely. He was incapable of helping me and I was unable to take on this burden alone.
I had the abortion at a Planned Parenthood and my experience was not good. As another woman wrote in these pages, the staff was rude and mean. However, it was not painful (I was awake the whole time). After the abortion I was very depressed, with (not surprisingly) no support from my partner. I now attribute this depression to hormonal changes and I encourage all women who are suffering after their abortion to give themselves some time and not try to over-analyze your feelings. After I equilibrated, I was fine and I have never regretted my choice. I was able to move on and I am now no longer tied to that partner (as I would have been if we had a kid). It has now been 7 years and I am grateful that I had access to an abortion.
When I think about my feelings at the time, and even today, I realize that I have been absorbing a lot of the anti-choice rhetoric that is assaulting us in the media. I do not believe it is wrong to abort a fetus that cannot live outside the mother's womb. But, I felt like I should be feeling ashamed when I had my abortion. When I clear out other people's voices, I am confident with my decision.
18 November 2004
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