My name is Alma and I'm 18 yrs. old.
I've known my boyfriend ever since the 9th grade, but we didn't start dating until
after we graduated from high school. In July he enlisted in the Navy and didn't
tell me until August, which is when we started to go out. He was a virgin and
I had already lost my virginity, so he was pretty eager.
He left for boot
camp in October of 98' and returned in December in which we celebrated New Year's
and accidentally conceived. He left three I had a feeling I was pregnant and I
was excited at first, but then reality set in and I thought about what would happen
with my relationship's with my parents. Then I thought about the whole 9 months
and how I'd have to do it alone because My boyfriend has a five year contract
with the NAVY, then I'd have to quit school and find a job.
This is the
point where I started to breakdown and cry every night. Luckily my parents were
going away for the weekend so I invited my best-friend Lupe over and took a home
pregnancy test. There were two in the kit and the first came out positive and
I went into shock and disbelief. I took the second test and once again it was
positive. I then called my brothers girlfriend Ester and asked her to come over.
When I showed her the tests she thought they were for Lupe and she wasn't tripping
too much but then I told her they were mine and her jaw hit the floor. Both were
telling me to call and tell my boyfriend, but that didn't sound like a good idea
because I was scared of what his reaction would be. But eventually I called later
on that night and he was relived because he thought I was going to break up with
He wanted me to make the decision for the both of us, but I told him
that wasn't fair, and that's when we both decided it would be best for me to have
So I made all the appointments and just waited which gave
me time to do a lot of thinking. I thought that maybe I could give the baby up
for adoption, but then I thought about a friend who gave her baby up for adoption
and now she's trying to get her baby back because she let herself get attached.
So March 1st came and I went to the doctor's to be dilated, and the following
day Ester took me to the Ambulatory department and I had an abortion. I can remember
being so afraid of being there and hearing the machine turn on and having to listen
to what I was doing. But fortunately they gave me an anesthetic and I was asleep
throughout the whole thing. That's the part that I'm happy about, I was asleep.
I ended up telling my mother and she was glad that I went to her, but then
in a conversation she had with Ester she told her that she would have liked me
to keep the baby. I feet like I had missed an opportunity, but was able to keep
my dreams and that hope that drives me to achieve better for myself and for the
family I hope I will one day have. Alma
17 March 1999
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in my opinion, is female self-respect.