Alma's Story

My name is Alma and I'm 18 yrs. old. I've known my boyfriend ever since the 9th grade, but we didn't start dating until after we graduated from high school. In July he enlisted in the Navy and didn't tell me until August, which is when we started to go out. He was a virgin and I had already lost my virginity, so he was pretty eager.

He left for boot camp in October of 98' and returned in December in which we celebrated New Year's and accidentally conceived. He left three I had a feeling I was pregnant and I was excited at first, but then reality set in and I thought about what would happen with my relationship's with my parents. Then I thought about the whole 9 months and how I'd have to do it alone because My boyfriend has a five year contract with the NAVY, then I'd have to quit school and find a job.

This is the point where I started to breakdown and cry every night. Luckily my parents were going away for the weekend so I invited my best-friend Lupe over and took a home pregnancy test. There were two in the kit and the first came out positive and I went into shock and disbelief. I took the second test and once again it was positive. I then called my brothers girlfriend Ester and asked her to come over. When I showed her the tests she thought they were for Lupe and she wasn't tripping too much but then I told her they were mine and her jaw hit the floor. Both were telling me to call and tell my boyfriend, but that didn't sound like a good idea because I was scared of what his reaction would be. But eventually I called later on that night and he was relived because he thought I was going to break up with him.

He wanted me to make the decision for the both of us, but I told him that wasn't fair, and that's when we both decided it would be best for me to have an abortion.

So I made all the appointments and just waited which gave me time to do a lot of thinking. I thought that maybe I could give the baby up for adoption, but then I thought about a friend who gave her baby up for adoption and now she's trying to get her baby back because she let herself get attached.

So March 1st came and I went to the doctor's to be dilated, and the following day Ester took me to the Ambulatory department and I had an abortion. I can remember being so afraid of being there and hearing the machine turn on and having to listen to what I was doing. But fortunately they gave me an anesthetic and I was asleep throughout the whole thing. That's the part that I'm happy about, I was asleep.

I ended up telling my mother and she was glad that I went to her, but then in a conversation she had with Ester she told her that she would have liked me to keep the baby. I feet like I had missed an opportunity, but was able to keep my dreams and that hope that drives me to achieve better for myself and for the family I hope I will one day have.

Alma
17 March 1999

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Feminism, in my opinion, is female self-respect.