I decided to tell my story after I read these courageous women stories. While away at college, I got involved with this guy. I have to be honest. I really knew not about his sexual history. I know we are supposed to ask these question, so we can protect ourselves. The whole situation seems like a big blur, and sometimes I can’t remember actually what happened.
But when I do remember, I remember this. It was the second or third time we had sex. And we always used protection (condoms). One day after we finished having sex, he asked me "did I know where the condom was?". I immediately grew angry. I asked him "what are you talking about?". We searched around looking for it, for what seemed like a long time. (When I think about it, he didn’t seem that concern or surprised) We finally found it, and I didn’t look like it had been used. I remember him telling me "we can go to some clinic and take care of it, I had nothing to worry about." The whole night I was up, thinking about what just happened. My instinct told me that something was wrong, wrong with his story, and reaction.
The next day we went to the hospital and I got the emergency contraceptive pill. The nurse’s were so supportive. I never received treatment like that since. (One nurse told me I should leave alone, something I eventually did.) I didn’t get my period for about three weeks, it seemed like the longest three weeks of my life. I know now that this guy was dishonest and selfish. He never thought about the consequences his selfish action would have on my life. And still to this day he will not full acknowledge his deceitful actions.
Although I will never know for certain if I was ever pregnant. I know that I made the right decision. The whole experience was overwhelming, and I had some amazing support. If I had not had the access to these reproductive choices, I don’t know what I would have done. But I am lucky I can say at the time I never had to think about it. I know now what I didn’t then, the importance of a woman’s right to choose.
I just want women to know that our reproductive choices are inherently ours. Never should a woman feel any kind of stigma, regarding her right to choose. Remember that woman being pro-choice is not pro-life, but acknowledging that women are intelligent and strong enough to make the choices regarding their bodies.
February 14, 2007
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